Asking for Forgiveness - 5784
Prayers for health and prosperity 🍎
I release the guilt, shame and fear that I have adopted out of carrying painful thoughts, stories and actions with me. I will leave these feelings behind in the last year and vow to move forward with an open heart.
Dear you work of art,
If you didn’t already know, yesterday marked the beginning of Rosh Hashanah, or, the first day of the Jewish new year! This time is about asking G-d for forgiveness and praying for a prosperous next year. It is symbolized with different foods, such as dipping apples in honey to symbolize a desire for a sweet new year.
I am celebrating alone this year, as my disabilities make it difficult to be in public places right now. I’m too worried about if the chairs will be comfortable, catching some bug, the food at dinner I won’t be able to eat, increasing inflammation in my body…. oh it’s so much. Honestly, very overwhelming. I need to buy my own Shofar for next year… that’s what I’ve been missing the most.
Asking for forgiveness
A big part of this high holiday is asking for repentance for our wrong-doings from the last year. It is said that G-d decides the fate of the whole next year within this period, so it is important to reflect on our wrongdoings. Since I cannot attend in-person services, I’ve been praying in my own words.
A prayer (which can be used within any belief system) for asking for forgiveness:
I am sorry to the people I have wronged. I am sorry for the times I was impatient, selfish, and un-accommodating. I’m sorry for the times I misunderstood, communicated poorly, and acted aggressively. I’m sorry for the times I could have done more, and I didn’t. I’m sorry for the times I left others feeling worse than before.
I am sorry for the times I was judgemental. For when I cast a downward gaze at someone who I envied or didn’t understand. I’m sorry for comparing myself to others in their own lives with their own unique stories. For the times I thought wishing poorly of them would bring more of my success. I can now see that judging others did not make their lives better, or my own.
I am sorry for the times I felt helpless and wanted to give up. For the times I acted selfishly. For the times I lay lambasted in guilt, shame, despair, dismay, and self-loathing for a little too long and did not take action. For the times when I felt I was alone and special, that no one could help me, and that I was doomed for a life of misery. Life is beautiful and messy, and going through ups and downs is a part of the process.
I ask for forgiveness for myself for the times I failed to rest and repair my soul. For the times I doubted myself, judged myself, and told myself I couldn’t possibly do any good in the world. I am sorry for the times I felt like I wasn’t enough, and I let it get to me.
I release the guilt, shame and fear that I have adopted out of carrying painful thoughts, stories and actions with me. I leave them behind in the last year and vow to move forward with an open heart.
Looking to the New Year
I pray the next year is filled with more adventures and experiences that spur inner growth and reflection. That my health will be consistent and I will become stronger, physically and mentally. I am excited to take care of myself this year, to become closer to G-d and my purpose, and to meet future friends who will become my chosen family. I pray for the success of my career and for more speaking, writing, and creation opportunities to fall into my inbox and show me what I am capable of. I pray for peace and security for my people and for peace and pluralism to be restored in the West.
These prayers are for everyone!
You don’t have to be Jewish to pray, or have mantras that make you feel good. Feel free to take my words and adapt them until you have something that resonates with you. Shana Tova, happy new year and happy reflections.
XOXO,
Hannah Bee
Too many questions that require answering as opposed to they don't apply to me so I didn't proceed, keep doing what you're doing. 🖖🖖